Episode 1: Joki Strava

Live-ish from Jakarta... it's Indonesia, Seriously! With your host... Raka!

Raka: Thank you! Thank you, please, sit down. You're making the guests nervous.

Raka: Welcome to Indonesia, Seriously. The show where we look at what's going viral in Indonesia, and ask the only reasonable question. Seriously?

Raka: Tonight's story. In Indonesia, running is huge right now. Every weekend, the streets are full of people in very expensive shoes, running very short distances, very slowly, for very long photo sessions.

Raka: And the most important part of running is not your heart. It's not your legs. It's your Strava.

Raka: For those of you outside Indonesia: Strava is an app that records your run, so you can post it, so people can see that you ran, so they know you're healthy. Healthy... socially.

Raka: But running is hard. It's hot. There's traffic. Your knees have opinions. So in 2024, Indonesia invented a solution.

Raka: The Strava jockey. You pay someone else to run... with your account.

Raka: Yes. Somewhere in Jakarta right now, a teenager is running ten kilometers, and somewhere else, a man on his sofa is getting the credit. Which, honestly, is also how a lot of offices work.

Raka: And it's cheap! Reported prices: around five to ten thousand rupiah per kilometer. That's thirty to sixty cents. For one kilometer of fake sweat.

Raka: Faster pace? More expensive. Want hills? That's extra. It's basically a menu. I'll have the five K, medium pace, extra elevation... no actual exercise, please.

Raka: To help us understand this, we have assembled our panel of experts. And I use the word experts... very loosely.

Raka: Our life coach. He has never been in a hurry in his life. Mas Selow!

Mas Selow: Santai, bro. Santaaai.

Raka: Our expert in everything ending. Professor Kiamat!

Prof. Kiamat: Good evening. It may be our last.

Raka: And a concerned citizen. Very concerned. Bu Ngegas!

Bu Ngegas: I'm not concerned, I'm FURIOUS! Hello!

Raka: Mas Selow. People paying strangers to run for them. Your thoughts?

Mas Selow: Bro... running is about the journey. And this way, it's someone else's journey. Even less stress.

Mas Selow: Here's some wisdom. If a run is recorded, but your legs never find out... did you even get tired? No. That's the beauty, bro.

Raka: That's not wisdom. That's just... not running.

Raka: Professor Kiamat. Is it really that serious?

Prof. Kiamat: Raka. Look at the data.

Prof. Kiamat: First, fake kilometers. Then fake marathons. Then fake medals. Then a fake athlete wins a fake gold medal... and the entire national sports budget is spent on jockeys.

Prof. Kiamat: This... is how it begins.

Raka: Professor, it's thirty cents a kilometer.

Prof. Kiamat: That is how they get you. Cheap... at first.

Raka: Bu Ngegas. I can see you've been holding something in.

Bu Ngegas: Holding? I've been holding it in since 2024! Don't get me started... Oh, I'm started!

Bu Ngegas: This morning I ran! For the bus! Two hundred meters! In sandals! Carrying groceries! Did anyone pay me? No! Did anyone give me kudos? No! The bus didn't even stop!

Bu Ngegas: And these people pay a kid to run for them, and then post: morning run, feeling blessed. Blessed? You're not blessed, you're on the sofa!

Mas Selow: Bu... santai. Breathe in...

Bu Ngegas: Don't tell me to breathe! I breathe on my own! With my own lungs! No jockey!

Raka: Okay. Okay! Let's look at the actual numbers.

Raka: This started in July 2024, as a joke post on X, and people turned it into a real business. Reported prices: five to ten thousand rupiah per kilometer. And Strava says sharing your account breaks its rules.

Raka: So the jockeys are mostly young people making pocket money. And the customers are people who want to look healthy, without the inconvenient part... which is being healthy.

Prof. Kiamat: So it is a crisis.

Mas Selow: So it is a vibe.

Bu Ngegas: So it is two hundred meters! In sandals!

Raka: Here's the thing. Running is one of the few things in life you cannot outsource. The kilometers don't count if your heart didn't run them.

Raka: So this weekend, go for a run. A slow one. A short one. An ugly one. Post it, or don't. Just make sure it's yours.

Raka: And if you see a teenager running at four-minute pace with two phones in his pocket... that's not an athlete. That's a small business.

Raka: That's our show. I'm Raka. Indonesia... seriously, we love you. Good night!